It’s been a long, long time since I’ve written anything here, and it kills me. Writing is as much a part of me as running. And nature. And...
Because it’s so unseasonably warm and awesome this week, I decided to shift my midweek runs to the evenings, after work. This way, I can enjoy 60 degree weather instead of 40 degree weather. Not that either is really that horrible. But I like to wear shorts. Free your legs, people!
Anyway, last night, I came home and wanted to get changed quickly so I could steal just a little bit of daylight before the sun set. Little did I know, Jamie had had a rough day.
The power of human interaction never ceases to amaze me. Especially because I so easily find comfort when I’m alone, in my little bubble of the internet, obsessive cleaning and craft beer. But the more I encounter these moments of unexpected interaction that make me feel happy, and connected, the more I realize there’s something to it. Some sort of cosmic transfer of energy that has broader meaning.
On my 6-mile run yesterday, I passed a young girl walking on the street. When I run in my neighborhood, I pretty much have to cover every side street if I’m doing anything more than three miles. My neighborhood just isn’t that big. So I passed her once, twice and then three times before I was on my way. The third time I passed her, I was running toward her and she was walking toward me, so we were facing each other. She looked up, smiled and waved a surprisingly energetic wave. It was unexpected. I immediately smiled and waved back with that same 13-year-old girl-like joyful wave. And within seconds, we parted ways.
The moment lifted me up. It was toward the end of my six miles, just the boost I needed. It was just happy, unassuming and simple.
Moments like that make me wonder what forces are at work around me. Is there something out there saying Alyssa, cheer the fuck up! Look at this happy-go-lucky girl and join her in her simple love of life! Or maybe we as human beings have something within us that just yearns for positive interaction. Maybe we just have to be open to it.
Whenever I’m on a park path, I try to acknowledge runners and cyclists passing in the opposite direction. Some people are friendlier than others. But all it takes is one true connection to make me feel like all is right with the world, and with my run. Like we’re all in this together. Just one wave, one “good morning” or even one simple nod of the head.
It’s been a long, long time since I’ve written anything here, and it kills me. Writing is as much a part of me as running. And nature. And music. And emotion. Writing helps me express myself.
When I’m not writing, I know it’s a sign that things aren’t okay in my head. Another sign is when I’m not singing in my car. So once the blog posts start flowing and the truck drivers start staring, you know I’m doing alright.
Last week, as I was rounding out the last mile of my 10 mile Wednesday night run, I noticed the moon at the end of the street. It was huge. It looked like it was right there, at the end of our street, like it could block the traffic. It was a cream color, not white. And it was as big as a fucking house. My 10 miles were done, but I couldn’t go right home. I had to go to it. So I ran another quarter mile to the end of the street, just to see the moon.
Of course, the moon was not actually at the end of our street, but I got closer to the best view in the neighborhood, and even though I was late for dinner and cold and hungry, I wouldn’t have traded that moment for anything.
It was in that moment that I realized I have to listen to my heart, to my gut and to what calls to me. That night, the moon was calling to me. And these past few months, the call I haven’t answered has something to do with rediscovering my true self through running, writing and being real. I’m not sure exactly what that means, but if you care to join me on this journey, it’s bound to be quite a ride.
Listen to your heart. Follow your moon. I’m positive there’s no other way to be.