Because it’s so unseasonably warm and awesome this week, I decided to shift my midweek runs to the evenings, after work. This way, I can enjoy 60 degree weather instead of 40 degree weather. Not that either is really that horrible. But I like to wear shorts. Free your legs, people!

Anyway, last night, I came home and wanted to get changed quickly so I could steal just a little bit of daylight before the sun set. Little did I know, Jamie had had a rough day.

After talking with him for a while, I learned the situation had to do with his ex-wife and his kids. I try so hard not to let her affect my relationship with Jamie or my relationship with the girls. But if I’m being honest, she does. And I know I’m not supposed to wish for things to be different when they can’t be, but I do.

As the conversation went on, I could feel myself sort of sink down into myself. I was getting angry and sad. It’s been hard for me to settle into our life here when this other force keeps throwing curve balls. Or, to make it a running analogy, it’s like I’m in a marathon and, just as I start to feel the flow of the race, I see a hurdle up ahead. And then just as I accept the fact that I’m going to have to jump over this hurdle, someone adds another one to the course. And then writes, “Sucker!” all over it.

I know, I know. Life is change. To desire things, or people, to be static denies the rules of nature. But I still get angry sometimes.

Nevertheless, I decided to continue with my plan for the night – a 5-mile run in the neighborhood. So I laced up and headed out the door. What followed was probably my best five miles ever. It was certainly my fastest with an average 9:18 minute pace (which is fast for me). But the speed isn’t what made it amazing. What made it amazing was the transformation I felt in my mind.

I started off angry, sure. And I let it power me through the initial gradual incline on our street. But then – and this is the amazing part – I could actually feel the anger melt away. Like it was flowing right off me as I ran. And then that feeling started to propel me forward.

A while back I wrote that you should never run angry. Well I’ve changed my thought on that slightly. I think it’s okay to start a run angry, if it helps get you moving, but I dare you – no, I double dare you – to finish it that way.